Surrogacy | How to Become a Parent If You are Infertile (Health Problems)?
The infertility problem is always a real tragedy for families that seriously want to become parents. Many men and women spend a tremendous amount of time, effort, and money, undergoing complicated treatment processes for years to hear happy children laughing at their home. But even today, with all the innovations in medicine and therapy, not every woman can become a mother. The problem remains relevant despite the great advancement of modern medical technologies. When all the attempts of doctors to help are fertile, young couples should consider alternative options such as child custody, adoption, or surrogacy if nothing else works.
What exactly is it that makes surrogate mothership so popular? These days, surrogacy becomes a more and more popular method to cope with infertility.
It has to do with such advantaged of this approach as:
- It is often not that important for many people that their child will be of their bloodline or not. The barren couples are glad to get the long-desired child and are ready to dismiss the fact that it has been born by another woman.
- The genetic mother won’t have to go through the ECO procedure and all the unpleasant analyses connected with it. Besides that, giving birth to a child won’t have any negative effects on the health of a donor-mother, which is also a very important aspect.
- Surrogacy service is also often an option for those people who don’t want to give birth themselves despite being able to, for the reason of it damaging their career. Many modern women don’t want to risk losing their job and be left without means to pay the bills because of the long period of bearing a child.
- A surrogate mothership contract can be entered into without any limitations and doesn’t require additional permissions by the regulatory government institutions.
- Thanks to the modern medicinal technologies, a fetus can be checked for any possibilities of genetic deviations before it even being inserted in the body of a surrogate mother.
- For a surrogate mother, this contract can be a great chance to fix her financial well-being, solve the accommodation problems, and pay for the bills if she has some issues with the occupation.
How to Pick the Right Surrogate Mother for Your Child
According to the results of American studies conducted in the latest years, people who resort to surrogacy in order to become parents are more often than not left happy about their decision right after and in the long run. The majority of donor-fathers are interested in establishing trusting relationships with surrogate mothers of their children. They insist on going to the doctor together and even be there for the women while they are giving birth.
Parents often have specific requirements for the actions of a surrogacy mother during the period of pregnancy. They are concerned about the diet of the mother and nurturing of their child, whether or not she has her days planned out and sticks to the schedule, whether she smokes and drinks alcohol — these are all vital aspects for the future parents.
Healthcare institutions have a range of demands for surrogacy mothers:
- The age of the mother should not exceed 38 years — it is due to the fact that pregnancy in older age is often connected with certain complications both during the period of childbearing and childbirth.
- Whether or not a surrogacy mother has her own child determines a lot as well. It is an indicator of the strong health of the woman. Seeing that a woman has successfully conceived, nourished, and gave birth to a child can tell doctors that she is a good candidate for this highly responsible event.
- The woman of choice should not abuse smoking, alcohol, and drugs — these things are unacceptable in the surrogacy practice because it can be dangerous for the health of a future child. It is also important that she leads a healthy lifestyle.
- A potential surrogate mother should also have a positive blood rhesus factor because there might be a rhesus conflict otherwise.
- The applying woman should not have any genetic diseases that can be transmitted to the child.
Psychologists say that a surrogacy mother should not only be in strong physical shape but also have a reliable psychological state. It has to do with the fact that the future child is inevitably going to be a part of her. And it might require outstanding courage to give it up to the client-parents after all the difficulties of giving birth.
Choosing the right surrogacy mother, you should keep in mind the following:
- A surrogacy mother is a person that is eventually going to help you become happier, so you should treat her with respect.
- You should establish an appropriate relationship with the surrogacy mother, even if you don’t really feel any attraction to her in the first place.
- You definitely should not put pressure on the surrogacy mother and make her alter her lifestyle completely or change her surroundings all at once (for the exception when the current environment is dangerous for the health of the future child). The mother will be much better off in her natural environment. Thus the pregnancy will be less stressful for her.
- While choosing the surrogacy mother, you need to pay close attention to her psychological state — how stable is her mind when overwhelmed with emotions. If the woman shows a tendency to burst into anger easily or is prone to depression and has other hysterical traits in her personality, this might become a serious problem for everybody when the time comes to pass over the new-born child.
- The contract must be worked out with consideration of all the necessary rules and conditions so that there will be no legal issues once the obligations were completed. The presence of a jurisdictional document will help both parties to feel more confident and relaxed.
To choose the right surrogacy mother for your family, you can to a corresponding donor agency or take advantage of the special services of a clinic. Institutions like this are helpful in reducing the responsibility of the parents and obviating the need to search for the potential surrogacy mother for their baby.
The Procedure of Surrogate Motherhood
Signing up for the service of a surrogate mother can be done by both a couple in a legitimate marriage and one that has not yet legitimated their relationships. The surrogacy can also be ordered by a single man or woman who wants to have a child.
The procedure has a range of phases, each of which has to be considered according to the current government rules concerning surrogacy:
- The first stage comprises searching for a surrogacy mother. At this point, you can either use your own intuition and look for the appropriate person to entrust with your future child or take advantage of one of the specialized institutions such as a professional agency for donor women. Many hospitals make the selection of surrogacy mothers themselves and even have their own databases. If you are determined to find the right woman without direct help from third parties, there are plenty of websites on the internet where women propose their services. It is a frequent practice when future parents find their surrogacy mothers in other countries. For example, you may live in Great Britain, but a specific woman from Ukraine fits you perfectly — you are then left with little options but to try and come to terms with her.
- The next step would be the necessary medical examination. A couple (or a single future parent) can address any available hospital to conduct the inspection or the surrogacy mother and themselves as well.
After the examination is successfully passed, the future parents should draw up a civil contract with the surrogacy mother. The document has to comprise of the obligations of both parties and the sum of money serving as compensation of the financial expenses during the period of pregnancy and birth of the child. The subject of the agreement is specifically the payments and not the child. Parental Rights for the child will then be transferred to the biological parents. Should any dispute concerning the subject of the contract. The possibility of its cancellation, or establishing of the parental rights arise during the pregnancy. They are all to be reviewed by the court.
After the medical inspection is finished, the procedure of extracorporal insemination is then performed by the doctors. The ovule of the future parent mother is extracted from her body, inseminated, and transplanted to the surrogacy mother. After the procedure, the woman is left in the hospital to be watched by the doctors for at least the following 5 days. After the next 12 to 14 weeks, doctors can accurately diagnose that the fertilization has been completed successfully.
During the entire term of pregnancy, an assigned doctor should watch over the health of the surrogacy mother. The donor parents should, in turn. Fulfill their obligations as stated in the contract and help the pregnant mother if needed.
After the baby is born, the biological parents should register him or her in the respective institution as their own. It is worthy of mentioning that the registration can only be done if the respective certificate from the hospital is provided. The agreement of the surrogacy mother should be stated in it alongside with her signature. Otherwise, it will be impossible to register the new-born by the surname of the biological parents.
The surrogacy mother can then be diverted from her parental rights only after the decision of the court. This procedure is necessary for all donor parents. And it is only with its help that they can attain the parental rights for the child. Babies born by surrogate mothers have the same rights and freedoms as everybody else. After they turn 18 years old. They are presented with the right to make an application to the court to bring back the parental rights to the surrogate mother.
Surrogacy is a great opportunity to become parents for those couples that are incapable of having their own baby due to the medical conditions or some other reason. This method has made many infertile families happy all around the world. And it continues to prove useful for thousands of couples. Both men and women, in families or single, can benefit from the surrogacy without restrictions from the government.